I served as the Grand Orator for the Grand Lodge of Free and Accepted Masons of Utah. It was fun. I have a lot of speeches I gave, and some I liked a lot. This one is the last one I gave and summed up a lot of what I had been speaking on throughout the year.

 

Letting Go
Final Oration by Matt Nelson

“Our culture today is obsessively focused on unrealistically positive expectations: Be happier. Be healthier.” ^[1] Be the best, better than the rest. Be smarter, faster, richer, sexier, more popular, more productive, more admired. Be perfect and amazing and crap out gold covered rose peddles before breakfast each morning while kissing your selfie-ready spouse and two perfectly crafted kids goodbye. Then fly your helicopter, or drive your Tesla, to your wonderfully fulfilling job, where you spend your days doing incredibly meaningful work that’s likely to save the planet one day. ^[1]

It seems the world wants you to believe that the key to a good life is a sexier job, or a faster car, or a prettier girlfriend, or more titles behind your name. Like Mark Manson illustrated in his book, the world is constantly telling you that the path to a better life is more, more, more—buy more, own more, make more, be more. ^[1] You are constantly bombarded with messages to care about everything, all the time. You are also attacked with the idea that what you are is not enough.

The problem is that caring about too many things, or rather about too many superfluous things, is bad for your health. It causes you to become overly attached to the superficial and fake, to dedicate your life to chasing a mirage of happiness and satisfaction. ^[1] The key to a good life is not caring about more; it’s caring about less, dedicating your passions to only what is true and immediate and important.

If you find yourself consistently caring about all the trivial stuff that bothers you your ex-girlfriend’s new Facebook picture, how quickly the batteries die in the TV remote, not getting elected to some seat you feel you’ve earned, or not being asked to wear a fancy hat chances are you don’t have much going on in your life to give a legitimate damn about. And that’s your real problem. Not the election. Not the TV remote. ^[1]

Freemasons have allowed this superfluous caring to infiltrate into our walls. Titles of Worshipful, Most Worshipful, Most Excellent Amazing Incredible King, have become so important to the membership, that titles are what it seems to be all about.

You are silently told you need to care about a title, because without one, who are you? Without one, who will listen to you? You need to care about the seat you sit in, the color of a ribbon you wear, your suit, the number of lapel pins you have, the number of Masonic books you’ve read, the number of appendant bodies you belong to. Because, after all, if you’re not ahead, you’re behind.

We are told, even within our sacred walls, you must have an agenda.

The quest for titles, honors, pins or positions is the quest of our egoism; this automatically pits us against each other. By definition, this type of ambition means we contend against those who we call “brother”. We begin to see each other as obstacles or annoyances, we begin imagining that others can make us be anything other than who we truly are. This dislocation from the truth brings fear and breeds hate among our brotherhood.

For the future of Freemasonry to be as amazing as we can imagine it, every brother within the fraternity must be willing to let go of mediocrity; stop promoting it, stop allowing it. When nothing radical, awesome or extraordinary happens within the Lodge, it is in danger of becoming mediocre.

In the wise words of Brother Robert Davis, there must be an educational, insightful, compelling, intellectual, contemplative or spiritual event every single time Masons meet. ^[2] When the fraternity misses on these events, it becomes just another social order that old men did, but holds no place in the modern age.

Brethren, there is nothing mediocre about Freemasonry. Yet the fraternity has become at very least mediocre and at worse obsolete; an outdated organization that continues to do the same things hoping for different results. This is validated by the swarms of members we continue to hemorrhage every year. Their choice to leave is their message to us; that what we have offered them, has little or no value in their lives.

Masonry needs to let go of anything that detracts from the true mission of the Craft, the search for the lost word; the search for divine truth. This search should drive every member to be exemplary men, part of an exemplary organization. To do this, the organization must be willing to let go. Let go of titles, positions, entitlement, of bad meals, green beans and cold coffee. Mostly, let go of egos. The members must have an incomparable awareness of who they are, what they are doing, what they know (and what they do not know), and then how to practice what they know.

I, for one, have recently fallen victim to this formidable enemy. I found myself striving to obtain praise and titles, fighting long and hard for a bit of colored ribbon. I found that I was motivated by my ego, instead of the success of my brethren. I thought I was looking for the success of the fraternity; I told members I was – I convinced myself I was. When asked if I wanted to continue to the Grand East I would answer very politically and say things like, “I will serve where the brothers need me.” When in reality I was hoping for personal elation.

I have found, through this realization, that I cannot make the changes to myself, or to Masonry, while in the Grand Lodge line. With the awareness of my motivation, understanding that I was pursuing advancement in Masonry for my own triumphs, I have asked that I no longer serve as a Grand Lodge Officer. Stepping away from this arena continues to be a difficult decision for me. I have had the opportunity to see the state of Masonry in Utah, I have been able to visit every single lodge, meet many brothers I would have otherwise never known. I have created and cultivated some of the best relationships and friendships I have with others involved in Grand Lodge, and it has absolutely been a pleasure. I have chosen to step away in an attempt to honor those relationships.

Brethren, Masonry is seen by outsiders, and some members, as an enlightened secret society. One that guards ancient mysteries and wisdom from the evils of the world. Men enter our doors engaged with this pop-culture teaser and anticipation. They expect something extraordinary, secret, divine, mysterious. With all the anticipation that has been presented, it is easy to see how candidates would leave disappointed. It seems, the fraternity cannot deliver on that unspoken promise; it seems, the fraternity is not ready for this kind of candidate.

Masonry is big enough to have big ideas. The process of Masonry, the process of learning, should open our minds and thoughts to ideas that may appear foreign. The Masonic process should welcome discussions and debates, it should even encourage dissent. It should never shut our minds to the possibility that these visions are exactly what Masonry was to men before, and what men want it to be again.

Make no mistake about it brethren: we have been watching members leave our ranks because intelligent men, seeking enlightenment, are not going to spend their evenings hearing the minutes read and the bills allowed, or not being welcomed into some imaginary clique inside our sacred walls, or even watching other men poorly exemplify the same ritualistic work they have seen a score of times.³ They will not even stay for a fancy title or even another “most-amazingly-awesome-incredible-master” degree. We have been watching them leave but fail to alarm each other of the doom that is ahead.

When examined closely, Masonry today can see a long shadow cast into the future. This shadow is one that may seem daunting, and even scary. When the future is dark, there is uncertainty. When the membership remains uncertain, there is hesitancy. However, this shadow can be overcome, and there can be brilliant light, but action must be taken. No member cannot sit idly by, and if they do, it is time we dismiss them. It may take a radical reboot to get past yesterday. In this reboot is the concept of letting go. All generations, every member, has something to let go of.

Look, this is how it works. You’re going to die one day. I know that’s kind of obvious, but I just wanted to remind you in case you’d forgotten. You and everyone you know are going to be dead soon. And in the short amount of time between here and there, you have a limited capacity of things to care deeply about. ^[1] It is important that we choose wisely those things that really matter, the things that are critical. In our Masonic language: we must learn to subdue our passions – all of them, even if our passion is Masonry; definitely if our passion is our ego.

What I’m talking about here is essentially learning how to focus and prioritize your thoughts effectively—how to pick and choose what matters to you and what does not matter to you based on finely honed personal values. This is incredibly difficult. It takes a lifetime of practice and discipline to achieve. And you will regularly fail. But it is perhaps the most worthy struggle one can undertake in one’s life. It is perhaps the only struggle in one’s life. ^[1]

When you allow egoism to run your actions, when your idea of Masonry is focused on personal accomplishments, titles, seats, hats, jewels, certificates and ribbons, you will see every adversity as an injustice, every challenge as a failure, every inconvenience as a personal slight, every disagreement as a betrayal. You will be confined to your own petty, skull-sized hell, burning with entitlement and bluster. You will measure yourself against the other egotistical narcissists, chaotically running in circles. In constant motion, yet arriving nowhere. ^[1]

What happens when we place admiration on the men who seek their ego? Egoism becomes the omniscient leader that guides the membership’s desires. We become a collection of self-centered individuals seeking the promotion that we believe we are entitled to.

Once upon a time, society venerated characters whose qualities inspired us to rise above ourselves and seek the betterment of the whole, rather than the self. We look to examples of men like Churchill, Lincoln, Gandhi, Mandela as men who sacrificed their own self-serving desires for the good of the masses around them.

Allow me to illustrate one example that took place in 458BC when the fledgeling Roman Republic was in danger of being destroyed. ^[4] Rome was under attack on two fronts by ancient enemies and it seemed that soon Rome may fall. So, armies were raised and battles waged. To no avail. Half of the armies had seemingly no chance of winning. Clinging to survival, they called for help. There was a provision in Roman Law that allowed for the appointment of a position known as “Dictator.” This position could be filled by the Senate in times of extreme crisis, and the man selected to perform this duty would have absolute, unchecked, unquestioned power over all aspects of the Republic and her armies.  It was a risky move, but desperate times called for desperate measures.  And the Senate knew just the man for the job:

Lucius Quinctius Cincinnatus.

When Cincinnatus arrived at Rome, assumed the mantle of Dictator and went to work immediately. He assembled an additional army, and mounted his horse, leading the march. He reached the line and gathered the troops. They delivered a crushing war, and swiftly took the spoils.

After the war, Cincinnatus and his men returned home as heroes. Cincinnatus was formally recognized as the hero who had saved Rome from the clutches of her enemies and near-certain defeat, slavery, and death.

With his work completed, Cincinnatus immediately resigned his post as Dictator and returned home to finish working his fields.  He had been the supreme ruler of the Roman Republic for only sixteen days.

While this is the most popular story involving Cincinnatus, it wasn’t the only time the people of Rome called on him to sort out a mess for them.  Almost 20 years later, in 439 BC, Cincinnatus (who was 80 years old at the time) was again brought in and given Dictatorial power to deal with a treasonous rebellion.  Cincinnatus effectively crushed the rebellion and within about a week of being appointed Dictator, he again resigned and returned home to his family.

These same qualities are seen in our most revered member. The man who gave up his army to go live quietly on his farm. The man who turned down the invitation to be king of a new country. The Mason who gave up the request to be the Most Worshipful Grand Master of the United States. ^[5] George Washington has given us a most outstanding example of selfless service to our brothers. He continues to guide our fraternity, and does so best as a common member.

Brethren, what a wonderful opportunity we have to be part of this together. The triumphs and defeats, the success and the failure, this fraternity continues to be an enigmatic teacher of enlightenment and brotherhood.

For it to continue to teach us, we must fight back the chaos, we must reclaim our fraternity and our brothers. There is hope for the individual and for the fraternity in general. Therefore, let us unite in our efforts. Put aside your quarrels, lay down egoism and help build the magnificent brotherhood we hope to all be part of.

I am grateful for the chance I have had to serve alongside some of the most extraordinary men I have met. I look forward to continuing to do so.

 

References

1. Manson, Mark. “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck.” Harper One, 13 Sep. 2016.
2. Davis, Robert. “Mediocrity in Masonry . . . Shame on us!” 3, Aug. 2015. Retrieved from: http://www.thelaudablepursuit.com/articles/2015/8/2/mediocrity-in-masonry-shame-on-us.
3. Wisconsin masonic handbook. Retrieved from: wisc-freemasonry.org/wp…/Chapter-1-Duties-of-Lodge-Officers-102011.pdf.
4. Thompson, Ben. “Lucius Quinctius Cincinnatus.” Retrieved from: http://www.badassoftheweek.com/cincinnatus.html.
5. “Facts For Speakers, About George Washington.” Feb. 1932. Retrieved from: http://www.masonicworld.com/education/articles/FACTS-FOR-SPEAKERS-ABOUT-GEORGE-WASHINGTON.htm.